I just had to share this with you.
I have tracker software on my blog. Tracker software is a wonderful feature of the internet that provides specific information that’s especially valuable for marketing products and services online. For example, a tracker can reveal who visits your site (no names or emails, just cities and countries), how long they stayed on your site, and even what they typed into a search engine like google in order to find your site.
So, this morning, as I was checking the tracker statistics for this blog, I noticed this:
See last line, Click to see larger image.
Someone in Jinzhou, China went to a computer, got online, opened up google.com, and typed in “I want to date a Jamaican in China.” My site popped up in the search engine results, and voila!
This, of course, leads to some interesting speculation, and some very important questions.
First of all, if she (hopefully a she) is searching for a Jamaican in China and found my site, then that might indicate that she didn’t know about my site before she searched. That’s very interesting. How on earth did that subject (and that desire) come up on its own???? Did she have a friend who dated a Jamaican (or perhaps even THIS Jamaican), and now she wants one of her very own?
Second, according to the tracker, she’s in China already. Is she a Chinese woman who has heard the rumors? Is she a non-Chinese woman, who now finds herself in China, and who wants to recreate a past experience? It’s all quite fascinating, don’t you think? I do.
But, I think you’ll agree with me that the most important question, all kidding aside, and beyond a shadow of a doubt, is, well…
HOW MUCH SHOULD I CHARGE?
With that in mind, I present to you my new service:
“I Want to Date a Jamaican in China!”
This could be you!
Yes, ladies, this could be you (and your friends, too! Don’t be selfish now!) For just a nominal hourly, weekly or monthly fee, you could be the envy of your friends and strangers throughout China when you stroll by with your very own foreign Jamaican “date!”
That’s right. They’ll ask (and you’ll NOW KNOW the answer to all the questions everyone is curious about). What questions? Use your imagination, ladies, and don’t play coy with us. We know you know.
Some restrictions, but big benefits apply. Inquire now for details.
And because I have entirely too much time on my hands, here’s the ad I envision. (I’ll have to create one in Chinese, too!)
click to view poster-sized, screensaver suitable ad
Um, don’t they have laws to describe this sort of thing?
9 thoughts on ““I want to date a Jamaican in China””
This was written 4 years ago, but it’s still so relevant. Since Bolt mash up the Olympics in Beijing, Chinese have been so fascinated with Jamaicans. I actually did a short documentary on this topic but from a female perspective while I was living in Beijing. If you like, you could watch it here https://youtu.be/nGgk1xB4aWw
Hey, Wow, I thought I was the only one, Vegetarian never mind Jamaican in China. I completely get this sense of humour. Its called survival!
so if u happen to be interested contact me, email@example.com
For real though I am really interested in dating a Jamaican girl living in China or better still Beijing
Ha, I love this posting…So thorough
LOL You’re a natural comedian! Keep up the good humor. Thanks for the laugh.
Perhaps it was a lonely Jamaican guy in China who was searching for his compatriot lady. The poster is very funny and has a good photo of you as well.
Walt, glad you are enjoying yourself, but you are letting your thoughts run off the deep end. Very deep… :-)
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